Joran van der Sloot and the Wheel of Destiny

The going theory about Joran van der Sloot is that he murders on a cyclical basis.  The cycle theory annoys me. My friend has a variation on it she applies to her life. She says that every year ending in an even number, like clockwork, she will have wonderful luck all year. She says it is her destiny, and there is nothing that can alter the cycle: she’s a permanent commuter on the Merry-go-round of Fortune.

I could see how this could become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

If someone at work notices you’re grumpy three mornings in a row, and tells people, “don’t talk to Brian before noon, he is not a morning person”. At some point, you find out people think you’re a grouch & tiptoe around you until lunchtime. Next time you bite someone’s head off at 9:30 am, you don’t feel so bad. People know you aren’t a morning person: pestering you before noon = asking for it.

Perhaps Joran van der Sloot operates on a similar philosophy. In any case, it’s pretty weird that he allegedly murdered Peruvian Stephany Flores, exactly five years to the day after allegedly murdering American Natalee Holloway.

"What? You know how I am."

Maybe if it’s true, he rationalizes it by saying, “I get homicidal in the spring! I can’t help who I am!” To make it doubly annoying, he has this O.J. Simpsonish smirk in all the pictures that says, “What are you gonna do about it?”

Nobody was surprised. Joran has managed to stay in the public eye ever since the first murder. He’s always up to little shenanigans: confessing to murder on a hidden camera, throwing wine into someone’s eyes (which you must admit is creative), trafficking Thai women, etc.

Here’s an alternative theory: what if he murdered Miss Flores, but NOT Miss Holloway?

For the sake of argument, let’s say one of his dozens of stories about dropping Natalee off at her hotel or the beach or wherever turned out to be true, or at least he didn’t hurt the poor girl. Still, the media dogged him relentlessly and portrayed him as a villain. As a result, he’s feared and treated as a murderer – so next time he’s in a situation where he feels threatened, murder is suddenly a viable option. Everyone already thinks he’s a killer anyway. Does that make the media partially responsible for the death of Stephany Flores?

The media, meanwhile, spends little time weeping over the victims. They were already running 24/7 coverage about “the Dutch playboy’s second murder” before bratty Young Joran was even arrested.

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2 thoughts on “Joran van der Sloot and the Wheel of Destiny

  1. Let peru colleague prissoners of Celblock D ask him. The scecret (and all the other girls) are worth al lot of money. Just do’nt kill him.

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